the extra mile 2 of 2
"Is there a way out? Yes, You are not going to be able to change your programming all that quickly, or perhaps ever. And you don't even need to. Try this: Imagine you are in a situation or with a person that you find unpleasant and that you would ordinarily avoid. Now observe how your computer instinctively becomes active, insisting that you avoid this situation or try to change it. And if you stay on there and refuse to change the situation, observe how the computer insists that you experience irritation or anxiety or guilt or some other negative emotion. Now keep looking at this unpleasant situation or person until you realize it isn't they that are causing the negative emotions. They are just going their way, being themselves, doing their thing whether right or wrong, good or bad. It is your computer that, thanks to programming, insists on your reacting with negative emotions. You will see this better if you realize that someone with different programming when faced with the same situation or person or event would react quite calmly, even happily. Don't stop until you have grasped this truth: Observe all of this from the outside so to speak and see the marvelous change that comes about in you.
Once you have understood this truth and thereby stopped your computer from generating negative emotions you may take any action you deem fit. You may avoid the situation or the person; or you may try and change them; or you may insist on your rights or the rights of others being respected; you may even resort to the use of force. But only after you have got rid of your emotional upsets, for then our action will spring from peace and love, not from neurotic desire to appease your computer or conform to its programming or to get rid of the negative emotions it generates. The you will understand how profound is the wisdom of the words: "If a man wants to sue you for your shirt, let him have your coat as well. If a man in authority makes you go one mile, go with him two." For it will have become evident to you that real oppression comes, not from people who fight you in court or from authority that subjects you to slave labor, but from your computer whose programming destroys your peace of mind the moment outside circumstances fail to conform to its demands. People have been known to be happy even in the oppressive atmosphere of a concentration camp! It is from the oppression of your programming that you need to be liberated. Only then will you experience that inner freedom from which alone all social revolution must arise for the powerful emotion, the passion that arises in your heart at the sight of social evils and impels you to action, will have its origin in reality, not in your programming or your ego." The Way To Love
The other night I spent time with someone I have known for a few years in these years our relationship has gone through many changes. The dynamic between us had most recently shifted to an unknown space. Our interactions a little awkward at first, like who is this, what is this, then remembering an old friend and finally being in each others company enjoying the energy and moment. After several hours, they were going to go and I felt this fear... had i had enough time or connection, or it was supposed to be a different kind of connection something more like it used to be, or a scenario that would make me "happier". I ended up listening to the fear and the result was a painful ending to the evening.
It wasn't until the next day I was able to see that it had been just perfect and lovely the way it had been. In truth it was just a moment with someone I love unconditionally. I didn't need to worry about when the next time would be that I would have such shared fun with this person, or if i would see this person again any time soon or at all for that matter. Rather, to remember the love that is in me that i get to carry into every moment of my life and journey with each interaction, each enjoyed gazing at the sky or into a loved ones eyes; take the love with me wherever i go.
It seems when I have had days in a row where i live with an open hand and heart, inviting wonderful experiences into my life i am able discover how abundant my life is by being in the moment. All the different people, places, new adventures and conversations, new ideas and creativity flows. It's when we get trapped in our programming, our ego, our thoughts, the fear... that we start to create conflict within ourselves and our external world when it has nothing to do with what someone else is or isn't doing in truth.
A small example is when a lover brings flowers to their beloved and they are both so delighted by the gesture in that moment of shared love. Then when in a state of feeling low or a feeling of discomfort or fear the lover might think "remember when you were brought those flowers and how good you felt, how much you liked it? Well if your lover would bring you flowers again it would make you happy." and it is believed that if something outside ourselves would just keep doing certain things we would be happy. Then there is an expectation that if flowers aren't brought it is a display of lack of love and now someone is expected to do or be a certain way for the others happiness.
Getting to the place of recognizing alone... has been and is painful yet everyday is different and recommitting each day to this practice has been born of the deep desire to be free of attachments. Remembering that no matter what other people do it should not dictate my happiness and that I can redirect my attention, experiencing peace and happiness no matter what happens in the external world. That i no longer have to let the people, events and things in life make me happy I get to be my own happiness to share, what freedom!!
"Is there a way out? Yes, You are not going to be able to change your programming all that quickly, or perhaps ever. And you don't even need to. Try this: Imagine you are in a situation or with a person that you find unpleasant and that you would ordinarily avoid. Now observe how your computer instinctively becomes active, insisting that you avoid this situation or try to change it. And if you stay on there and refuse to change the situation, observe how the computer insists that you experience irritation or anxiety or guilt or some other negative emotion. Now keep looking at this unpleasant situation or person until you realize it isn't they that are causing the negative emotions. They are just going their way, being themselves, doing their thing whether right or wrong, good or bad. It is your computer that, thanks to programming, insists on your reacting with negative emotions. You will see this better if you realize that someone with different programming when faced with the same situation or person or event would react quite calmly, even happily. Don't stop until you have grasped this truth: Observe all of this from the outside so to speak and see the marvelous change that comes about in you.
Once you have understood this truth and thereby stopped your computer from generating negative emotions you may take any action you deem fit. You may avoid the situation or the person; or you may try and change them; or you may insist on your rights or the rights of others being respected; you may even resort to the use of force. But only after you have got rid of your emotional upsets, for then our action will spring from peace and love, not from neurotic desire to appease your computer or conform to its programming or to get rid of the negative emotions it generates. The you will understand how profound is the wisdom of the words: "If a man wants to sue you for your shirt, let him have your coat as well. If a man in authority makes you go one mile, go with him two." For it will have become evident to you that real oppression comes, not from people who fight you in court or from authority that subjects you to slave labor, but from your computer whose programming destroys your peace of mind the moment outside circumstances fail to conform to its demands. People have been known to be happy even in the oppressive atmosphere of a concentration camp! It is from the oppression of your programming that you need to be liberated. Only then will you experience that inner freedom from which alone all social revolution must arise for the powerful emotion, the passion that arises in your heart at the sight of social evils and impels you to action, will have its origin in reality, not in your programming or your ego." The Way To Love
The other night I spent time with someone I have known for a few years in these years our relationship has gone through many changes. The dynamic between us had most recently shifted to an unknown space. Our interactions a little awkward at first, like who is this, what is this, then remembering an old friend and finally being in each others company enjoying the energy and moment. After several hours, they were going to go and I felt this fear... had i had enough time or connection, or it was supposed to be a different kind of connection something more like it used to be, or a scenario that would make me "happier". I ended up listening to the fear and the result was a painful ending to the evening.
It wasn't until the next day I was able to see that it had been just perfect and lovely the way it had been. In truth it was just a moment with someone I love unconditionally. I didn't need to worry about when the next time would be that I would have such shared fun with this person, or if i would see this person again any time soon or at all for that matter. Rather, to remember the love that is in me that i get to carry into every moment of my life and journey with each interaction, each enjoyed gazing at the sky or into a loved ones eyes; take the love with me wherever i go.
It seems when I have had days in a row where i live with an open hand and heart, inviting wonderful experiences into my life i am able discover how abundant my life is by being in the moment. All the different people, places, new adventures and conversations, new ideas and creativity flows. It's when we get trapped in our programming, our ego, our thoughts, the fear... that we start to create conflict within ourselves and our external world when it has nothing to do with what someone else is or isn't doing in truth.
A small example is when a lover brings flowers to their beloved and they are both so delighted by the gesture in that moment of shared love. Then when in a state of feeling low or a feeling of discomfort or fear the lover might think "remember when you were brought those flowers and how good you felt, how much you liked it? Well if your lover would bring you flowers again it would make you happy." and it is believed that if something outside ourselves would just keep doing certain things we would be happy. Then there is an expectation that if flowers aren't brought it is a display of lack of love and now someone is expected to do or be a certain way for the others happiness.
Getting to the place of recognizing alone... has been and is painful yet everyday is different and recommitting each day to this practice has been born of the deep desire to be free of attachments. Remembering that no matter what other people do it should not dictate my happiness and that I can redirect my attention, experiencing peace and happiness no matter what happens in the external world. That i no longer have to let the people, events and things in life make me happy I get to be my own happiness to share, what freedom!!
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